Vorbe de duh :))

:) Am strans niste "vorbe" daca le putem spune asa :P care mi s-au parut mie mega tari :D funny si true unele :P(Most are about sex though) So m-am gandit ca ar fi nice sa share :P
(Sunt"ingrosate" the ones I like most :P)

Enjoy:D


My girlfiend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine'

When I'm good I'm very, very good but when I'm bad I'm better.

My wife is a sex object. Evertime I ask for sex, she objects.

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

A terrible thing happened to me last night again - Nothing.

I think people should be free to engage in any sexual practices they choose; they should draw the line at goats though.

It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty.


Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night

A nymphomaniac is a women as obsessed with sex as the average man.

Sex is the invention of a very clever venereal disease.

Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.

My ultimate fantasy is to entice a man to my bedroom, put a gun to his head and say, 'Make babies or die

Girls are always running through my mind. They don't dare walk.

What's the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I'm home.


You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

I'm a double bagger. Not only does my husband put a bag over my face when we're making love, but he also puts a bag over his head in case mine falls off.


My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself."

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex

I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?


You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither!

Sex is emotion in motion. ~ Mae West

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 a minute.

Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time.

Tell him I've been too fucking busy - or vice versa.



If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

I'm not talented enough to type and pick my nose at the same time.

If life gives you lemons, throw them at some one!

I fell out of my chair. This might take a while.

A day without sunshine is like... night.

I'm not here right now but if you scream really loud into your monitor I might be able to hear you!

Help!Ican'tfindthespacebar!

I'm on a mission to save the world (I can't believe they trusted me with this).

I have been temporarily distracted by a shiny object.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they're not after you.

Do NoT Type like Tis... It MaKeS you LoOk ReT@RdEd.

I was about to conquer the world but then I got distracted by something shiny.

Girls rule while boys drool!

I'm a girl and I bite so don't bother me.

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

If you think girls are all for clothes make-up, jewelry and boys, then you're right.

Girls know everything, boys just don't know it yet.

Coffee, chocolate, and men. Some things are just better rich.

I'm not a complicated person I'm just good at complicating things.

Don't hate me because I'm smart and pretty ; hate me because your boyfriend thinks so.

He broke my heart so I broke his jaw.

It's a girls world, guys just live in it.


I don't need your attitude... I've got my own.

Men are like high heels; they're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

God created man then He had a better idea.

Pentru mine ...

Se pare ca lumea vrea sa mai scriu .. ma mir nu ma asteptam ... hehe poate imi dezvolt un obicei din asta ar fi o chestie hehe .. Dar ce sa va mai zic?

Despre mine .. atm .. o sa fac un fel de retrospectiva a anului asta ...
De la rev incoace am facut mai multe lucruri decat am facut in ultimi doi ani .. really .. gen am trecut printr-o gramada de experiente noi si sentimente noi .. chestii pe care nu le-am mai simtit pana acum .. sau pur si simplu vechile sentimente duse in extrema ..
Am facut un lucru de care sunt foarte mandra in mod special ... am reusit sa imi controlez sentimentele gen .. am reusit sa fac rau fara sa imi pese pentru ca asa era mai bine pentru mine .. am reusit sa spun nu si sa merg mai departe fara sa ma uit inapoi atunci cand imi doream din tot sufletul sa spun da tot pentru ca pe termen lung era mai bine pentru mine .. si facand chestiile astea am ajuns intr-o stare de liniste si echilibru perfecta care chiar imi face bine acum .

Mi-am mai dat seama de o chestie anu asta ... Astia care scriu telenovele nu stiu nimic .S-au intamplat atatea lucruri de te doare mintea atatea incurcaturi gen "legaturi bolnavicioase" ca in momentul in care am incercat sa ii povestesc cuiva tot .. pur simplu nu a inteles nimic ... Nici eu nu mai inteleg dar incepe sa imi placa ..Si cum sunt in starea asta de extrem de mi se rupe nici ca puteau pica mai bine ... sunt o gramada de lucruri acare m-ar fi afectat in trecut .. acum pur si simplu m-am obisnuit sa se intample o gramada de cacaturi ca in adevaratul sens al expresiei eu ma astept la orice ... nimic nu e imposibil ..

Ce sa intelegeti voi din toata povestea asta ?
Ei bine nu mare lucru ... Nu e bine sa iti fie frica sa schimbi lucrurile .. haosul poate fi chiar benefic ... Tot raul inspre bine ..."For the greater good"-idee luata din Harry Potter
It worked for meh :P